Nine Protests
by Beckon
Summary: Haylen knew she would only get hurt from showing up, and yet, she did it anyways. ... She guessed some part of her just wanted to know for certain- she had to know. And while any sense of closure she might've gotten from it was bittersweet, she still felt raw and cut open on the inside. [Blind Betrayal Spoilers] [AU]
1. Rooftops

"The Synth who called himself Paladin Danse has been eliminated."

Haylen curled her hands into fists at the words- using every ounce of self-control to keep her body from shaking. She kept her eyes locked on the ground in front of her- afraid that if she looked up and so much as _saw_ Maxson forming those spiteful words... she would lose it.

She was afraid that she would give into an ugly outburst right here on the Prydwen.

That she would tell Maxson that he really was the piece of shit she always thought he'd been.

 _Focus on your breathing,_ _Haylen_ , she thought to herself, trying not to make the sharp breaths being sucked through gritted teeth sound so loud, _don't let them find out._

"His body, and all records of him, have been incinerated."

The soldiers around her gave out quiet, sickening cheers, and Haylen inadvertently felt her eyes being drawn up to Maxson. She wondered if he might've had some kind of shit grin on his face at everyone's praise.

Instead, her eyes widened and her breath hitched in her throat as she saw Danse's holotags dangling from the Elder's raised fist.

And any sense of hope she might've had quickly turned into rocks in her stomach- causing it to clench and threaten to up heave everything she had eaten for breakfast hours before.

"He had to be an example, not an exception- remember this when we make war with the Institute. Remember that he was an infiltrator- a spy, and our enemy. And we will not be caught off-guard again."

If she hadn't been wearing gloves, Haylen was certain that her nails would've cut into the skin of her palms by now.

Despite her best effort, she could feel the tremors running through her body- Hell, she could almost hear her teeth chattering together as she tried to keep her jaw locked tight.

... How could he?

After everything Danse had done for the Brotherhood, for Elder Maxson, how could they just... treat him like this? Treat him like garbage that had to be tossed out- that had to be incinerated.

"As it stands, we now have an opening in our ranks. One that needs to be filled before we can take on the Institute, as we cannot take them on without having an united front."

How long could Maxson talk for?

His speeches tended to be long-winded and never-ending to begin with, but this... this was getting sickening. What else was there left to say? Was he going to hold some kind of sick competition for the open rank of Paladin? Was he using this disgusting opportunity to garner support and see who out of the army before him was truly willing to do whatever it was that he asked of them?

"I am awarding that rank to our newest recruit. You will now address her as Paladin Nora- and I can assure you, despite her quick recruitment, she has well earned this promotion. She assisted in both the apprehension, and execution of M7-97. I see a bright future for the Brotherhood with her at our side."

There was even more cheering as Nora stood up from where she had been seated out of sight nearby- allowing the crowd to look her over and congratulate her.

Allowing the crowd to refer to her by her new rank already.

 _Paladin Nora._

...

There were more rocks rolling around in her gut now.

Maxson couldn't have called for a dismiss soon enough.

Haylen was the first one out of the room and she found herself practically running back out onto the flight deck. Just looking at the dark-haired woman standing before the crowd nearly made her lose all sense of self-control.

What she wouldn't have given to call Nora out right then and there.

But she wasn't stupid.

Showing any sense of support for Danse was like holding up a giant 'I support the Institute' sign.

Haylen felt the bitter cold breeze against her cheeks as she made her way down the narrow walkway and headed towards her parked Vertibird. She needed to get back to the Cambridge Police Station as soon as possible anyways- to give Rhys an update on the situation. The man had decided to stay behind with the rest of their unit to keep the station on lockdown; they had been getting harassed by Raiders on and off for the past few days, so she wasn't surprised by his decision to stay back. She had only opted to go to the Pyrdwen in faint hopes that... maybe something good had happened, that maybe Danse had been able to strike up a deal of some sorts with Maxson.

She knew she would only get hurt from showing up, and yet, she did it anyways.

... She guessed some part of her just wanted to know for certain- she _had_ to know.

And while any sense of closure she might've gotten from it was bittersweet, she still felt raw and cut open on the inside.

Climbing into her Vertibird, Haylen tried to start up the engine, but found her fingers far too stiff and shaky to do so; it was like she couldn't unfold them after having them clenched for so long.

The numbing pain in her joints only added to her frustration, and before she knew it, she could feel the hot, angry tears rolling down her cheeks.

...

It wasn't fair.

After everything Danse had done, after everything he had sacrificed...

It didn't have to end like this.

Haylen's own little pity party didn't last long as she heard someone climb into the passenger seat next to her; she hastily tried to wipe away at her wet cheeks in a failed attempt to hide them. She wasn't sure how she was going to explain this... _situation_ , but she figured she was always good with bullshitting on the spot.

"Just fly us somewhere- preferably isolated."

She felt her body turn stiff at the voice, before she turned to look at the woman who was seated next to her- looking every bit as uncomfortable with the arrangement as she was. And Haylen wondered how she had managed to escape the crowd so quickly. Wouldn't she have wanted to stand around and listen to everyone praise her for such a great job?

"What the hell do you want?" Haylen muttered through clenched teeth, knowing well she couldn't say exactly what she wanted to. She still had Proctor Quinlan on her ass about having talked back to Nora the day before- when she was only a _Knight_.

"I need to talk to you," Nora insisted, glancing out the side of the Vertibird, as though expecting someone to be following her, "- preferably now, _please_."

...

The last thing Haylen wanted was to be stuck in the air with this woman, but she didn't have much of a choice.

Something about the desperate edge in Nora's voice just... didn't settle with her either.

Finally starting the engine, Haylen signaled to the flight deck crew that she was taking off, and held tight to the controls as the Prydwen slowly released her Vertibird. She ran through the protocol and made sure she had the wings extended and the propellers going before the mechanical arm detached from them- leaving them on their own.

Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as Nora held nervously to her seat, and took some delight in knowing that the woman didn't seem to like the process of detachment. Not that many people in the Brotherhood did- but they all just got used to the five seconds of free fall before the propellers caught on.

In the back of her mind, the only silver lining Haylen could find in this situation was that she had the option to crash the Vertibird at any time- hopefully killing the two of them in a mistaken accident.

It was a spiteful thought, but... it would keep her sane for now.

...

Paladin Nora requested privacy, so Haylen couldn't make a direct fly back to the police station.

Her second best place was the rooftop of the old Geenetech Genetics building. While it wasn't the safest of places, it was well out of sight, and out of radio range of any of the Brotherhood patrols in the area. It was as good as it was going to get in terms of privacy.

Landing was a little tricky, but not something that was out of her level of expertise.

She still landed a little rough just to get a reaction out of the new Paladin.

"Now what do you want?" Haylen pressed, as she cut the Vertibird's engine. "Are you here to tell me that you listened to Danse's side of the story and decided that he still wasn't good enough to live? That despite everything he did for you, you decided the best way to pay him back was to put a bullet in his head?"

Despite Nora's stone-faced look, she flinched at her heavy words.

And Haylen hoped that they hurt the woman as much as they hurt her.

"Maxson's lying."

A brief scoffing sound came from Haylen's throat at the words. "What kind of fucking game are you trying to play here?" she muttered, as she looked out across the rooftops around them- trying to find a distraction in the broken skyline. "Elder Maxson doesn't lie- there are no secrets in the Brotherhood."

Christ, she sounded like a goddamn, broken record, but she was not going to be lied to.

She was not going to have this woman try to convince her of something that wasn't true. And she... she sure as hell wasn't going to put herself into a position of getting hurt- not again.

"Well there's one now," Nora insisted. "Danse isn't dead."

Haylen's breath got caught in her throat once more at the words, before she turned to meet Nora's eyes; her expression continued to be unmoving, which meant that there might've been a possible chance that she wasn't lying... She had a short amount of time to get to know Nora, and in running those few op missions, she found the woman to be rather blunt.

She never found a reason not to trust Nora- not to take her word on things, especially since Danse was mentoring her. And especially since she had gone out of her way to save their asses back at the police station the first time they had crossed paths.

... But if Nora wasn't lying...

"But how?" Haylen pressed, trying to keep her voice from shaking at the smallest of possibilities. "Maxson had his holotags, and he said you-"

"I spoke with Danse like you asked, and I convinced him that killing him wasn't the right option," Nora spoke, before she gave off a sort of nervous, yet relieved kind of laugh; one hand rubbing the back of her neck. "I couldn't believe it, you know? Danse was damn well prepared for me to kill him- even prepared to kill himself if I refused; he wanted to die, and... I had to talk him down, tell him there was nothing he needed to run from. We worked it out, and he gave me his holotags to pass on to Maxson so I could 'prove' that I had killed him."

...

Haylen wanted to believe her- she did, more than anything.

Nora's story sounded solid, it sounded believable, and her nervous twitches debunked the possibility of the story being rehearsed. And Haylen would've like to believe that Nora did the only right thing in that given situation, but...

Haylen said nothing as she pushed herself out of the Vertibird, and onto the uneven rooftop. Part of her felt like she was going to throw up out of sheer relief; her head was spinning at the influx of new information, and she found herself suddenly weak in the knees. But she couldn't let herself focus on it- couldn't let herself be blinded by the prospect- the _unproven_ prospect.

And just as she figured, she heard Nora get out of the Vertibird soon after, and heard the woman follow after her.

The Vertibird was shut off, which had cut the radio clean as well... but Haylen didn't want to risk the rest of their conversation still getting leaked somehow.

"If what you're saying is true, and I... God I hope it is, how can I know for certain?" Haylen pressed. "I want to take your word, believe me, but things like this just don't slip past Maxson."

"See, that's the interesting part..." Nora started, as she set her hands on her hips, before she moved to cross her arms instead. "Maxson does know."

... No.

No, that couldn't be.

Maxson wouldn't stand in front of the Brotherhood, in front of his own brothers and sisters, and announce a lie. That wasn't possible for him to do- it was out of character, it defiled everything that an Elder was supposed to be.

"Maxson followed me to the bunker to ensure that I went through with his order," Nora continued, perhaps picking up on her disbelief. "He, unfortunately, ended up catching us as we were trying to leave. And when he found out that I had refused to kill Danse, he got angry and threatened to kill Danse himself."

To say that Haylen was enthralled in this elaborate lie, or painfully truthful story, was an understatement.

The story of a rogue synth turned Paladin, a two-hundred year old woman, and a man too young for the position he was in... Who the hell could write something like that? Let alone know how to end it.

"... What happened?" Haylen pressed once more.

"I told Maxson that he was more than welcomed to pull the trigger, but that he'd have to go through me first," Nora answered. "And that he damn well knew that if he so much as aimed a gun at me... well, only one of us would be going back to the Pyrdwen- and it wasn't going to be him. So, we ended up brokering a deal. Maxson let Danse go free, but under the conditions that he never try to contact the Brotherhood, and that he stay out of their way. And if he couldn't abide by those rules, then any and all units would be ordered to fire at him upon sight."

Haylen flinched at the proposed deal.

It was a relief to know that Danse had gotten away with his life, but... the Brotherhood was his life.

He never talked about anything else.

So, without the Brotherhood, what else would there be for him out there?

"What exactly is Maxson's plan if someone on patrol recognizes him out in the Commonwealth?" Haylen asked.

Nora offered her a brief shrug and dropped her hands back to her hips. "I don't know, he rambled off something about the Institute making multiple synths of the same person for infiltration or something. I didn't stick around to argue with him any further, and tried to get him out of there as soon as possible. All I can tell you is that, as of right now, Maxson and I have each other in the our own pockets. If someone were to find out the truth about this whole thing, well... we would both go down with the ship. It comes back to me because I didn't kill Danse, but it also comes back to Maxson for not doing the job properly himself. I mean, he took my word enough that he gave me a promotion, a new suit of power armor, and my own room on the Prydwen. He can't risk fucking that up, or else he drags his own title through the dirt."

...

If the risk of dropping to her knees might not potentially throw her off the side of the building, or through five stories worth of floors below... Haylen might've done it out of sheer relief. It felt like she was going to be physically sick as all the stress from before now seemed useless- although it had well rotted in the pit of her stomach. She knitted her hands over the back of her neck and took several long breaths before it felt like she could bypass the urge to throw up long enough to speak again. "I... thank you," she whispered.

"No need to," Nora assured, before she moved one hand to squeeze Haylen's shoulder. "I had to put on a show with you earlier since there were too many people watching, but... just know that I never had any intentions of hurting Danse."

"Why exactly?" Haylen questioned. "I mean, not to sound ungrateful, but... with how the Brotherhood acts, with how the people of the Commonwealth act... Everyone hates the Synths. Everyone wants them dead-"

"Not everyone," Nora interrupted, "not, say... the Railroad."

Haylen paused at the answer- taking note of how the woman went out of her way to enunciate the term. The Brotherhood was familiar with the Railroad, and had regarded them as their enemy early on, simply because of their sympathies towards Synths. Honestly, she never saw the purpose in the feud. It was obvious the Railroad was in no way equipped to take on the Brotherhood, so why bother wasting energy chasing them down?

...

And if all of the Synths that they were saving, if they were in any way like Danse... then what was the harm in their operations?

"Do you think you could drop me off near Greygarden before you head back to the police station? I need to do some cleaning up in that area."

It was an... odd request, and a random one at that, but Haylen was fully aware of the Paladin's involvement with the Minutemen of the Commonwealth; they were always around working on their settlements and trying to keep the areas safe and clean. She had run into a few of their patrol units while doing some of her own op runs, and... the Minutemen were strangely always nice and pleasant to speak to- and always willing to give directions.

"Yeah- sure thing," Haylen nodded, as she started back to the Vertibird, before she stopped and turned back to the Paladin. "Is he... is Danse still at that bunker I sent you to?"

"For now," Nora replied. "I think he's going to stay there until the issue blows over. The bunker's secured, and we reprogrammed the surface terminal with an access code that can't be hacked, so he's got full control from the bunker. The only way to get in is if he lets you in- and you gotta talk to him ahead of time so he knows it's not a set up. Plus, you said that the two of you were the only ones who knew about that place- and I don't see Maxson sending any units into that direction; he won't play that kind of risk. So, for now, he's the most secured man on this half of the Commonwealth."

It was reassuring to hear that Danse was taken care of, but... it didn't completely settle the weight in her chest.

"I would still give it a few days, at least a week or two, before you go over there," Nora continued. "He's uh... he's having to work out a lot of things right now, and he's gonna need some time."

"I can't wait a few days," Haylen spoke, "I've been under the impression that he was dead this entire time. I... I just need to see him for myself, to see that he's alive and..." she couldn't even finish her sentence without her voice threatening to give away.

Nora didn't say anything at first, but her face seemed to say it all. "I understand..." she nodded, before she offered a brief smile. "He was worried about you too, you know- worried that you were going to get yourself into trouble over him."

"Yeah well... I guess he was right to worry."

* * *

"You sure you want to take this OP on by yourself?"

Haylen smiled lightly at the question; her fingers busy with pulling her hair back into its usual tail, before she quickly pulled her hood over it. She even took the time to ensure that each red strand was tucked inside. "Oh come on, Rhys, I'm not an Initiate anymore; I can handle myself- you trained me after all."

"I know, but I've looked at your maps, and that's a long trek to make by yourself," the man insisted, as he rolled up the maps she had sprawled across the table between them; his heavy hands making quick work of the thin paper. "And after everything with Danse... I just want to make sure you don't fuck up on something; we can't afford to lose anyone else on the team."

She felt her smile falter slightly at the words.

She knew Rhys was trying to be... considerate about the situation, but he wasn't going to let his emotions show. He cared about Danse just as much as she did, but as far as he was concerned, the matter was behind them now; he couldn't risk something derailing their operation here.

...

He never was good with emotions.

"Exactly, we're short on men, and short on technology- and everyone else has their hands tied with Liberty Prime right now," Haylen replied, as she picked up her bag from the floor and hoisted it onto her shoulders. "It'll be a quick OP- just a few days, in and out. I'm having one of the birds drop me off at the Poseidon Energy building, and from there it'll be a quick walk to Med-Tek Research. I've got a few readings on some goodies out there, and I'd like to get my hands on them first. Plus, if it turns out to be a formidable place, it could prove worthy in training some of the Squires."

Rhys wrinkled his nose at her, but gave no further argument. "Fine. Just don't let your guard down out there," he muttered, as he handed her the rolled up maps. "I can't risk losing you too."

She smiled at what could've been meaningful words, as she grabbed the maps and stuffed them into the side of her bag.

"Don't you worry about me, Rhys; I'll be back before you even have a chance to miss me."

* * *

"Ad Victorium, sister!"

Haylen smiled and gave the pilot a brief wave as the Vertibird pulled away. "Ad Victorium, brother," she muttered, less enthusiastically under her breath, before she turned away and started on her trek.

It would take her a few hours to get anywhere from the Poseidon Energy building, but... it was safer this way. She knew about the Super Mutants that herded around and patrolled the Med-Tek area, which was why she didn't request a Vertibird landing anywhere near that direct location. They might've had an air advantage over most things in the Commonwealth, but that didn't mean someone, or something, couldn't shoot them out of the sky still.

Besides, it didn't hurt to walk every now and again.

It reminded her of her scavenging days before the Brotherhood.

... It was stupid to think that, with the security and strength the Brotherhood gave her, Haylen found herself missing those days. She missed the open freedom to do what she wanted- to _help_ who she wanted.

Haylen followed the nearby coastline first; she figured she was too limited on daylight to really get anywhere- and since she was traveling by herself, she didn't want to risk a night exploration. Even now, she was still surprised that Rhys had let her go on her own. Not that he was the most protective of people, but... he wasn't stupid; she was kind of impressed that he didn't see through her plan.

...

There was supposedly a boathouse along the coast that she could use; Nora told her to camp there for the night if she needed to. It was well-defended and well-fortified- and the best part, no one was there. At least, not yet anyways.

It must've been another one of Nora's Minutemen projects.

... So, she spent the night in a boathouse, listening to the faint buzzing of the bloodbugs in the distance.

It was cozier than she was expecting, and Haylen found herself wondering if this was the kind of stuff that Nora and her Minutemen intended to do across the Commonwealth. She didn't know much about the organization- only what she had heard in passing, and maybe eavesdropped from Nora when she was on the radio.

Because when the woman wasn't busy being Paladin, she was a General, right? Quite the promotion.

And if this is how her organization planned to help the Commonwealth, by setting up safe and fortified settlements for people lost in this world, then... why did Nora even bother with the Brotherhood? It wasn't like their idea of helping the Commonwealth was half this noble. All they wanted to do was horde technology and shoot people who didn't belong here.

Sure, less Super Mutants and less feral ghouls made it easier to sleep at night, but... at what cost?

...

Haylen didn't think she spent as much time sleeping as she did just lying there- thinking. Wondering what exactly it was that she planned to do from this point. She wanted to see Danse- she _needed_ to see that he was alive and well, but... then what?

Danse might not even want to see her.

He might not even be in a stable state of mind.

... But she needed to know.

Hopefully he would forgive her for that much.

...

Haylen was up and gone by the time the sun came up.

She bypassed the Med-Tek Research building three hours later- and went well out of her way to avoid suspicion from the dwelling Super Mutants. The stench of the place, even from a distance, was overwhelming. Even if she did come back for the tech inside, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to make it past the smell.

And God _forbid_ she'd allow the Squires to get anywhere close to this place.

Still, she made sure to toss her bag, with her radio in it, close by the building. It was a small safety net just in case someone tried to track her through the frequency; for all they'd know, they would find her exactly where she said she'd be. And it would make sense, with Super Mutants in the area, for her to be on radio silence for most of her trip.

...

She made it to Listening Post Bravo barely four hours after that.

And she spent nearly half an hour just sitting outside- not sure what to do, or where else to go from here.

But she eventually convinced herself that she didn't come all this way for nothing; she didn't make a damn fool of herself in front of Proctor Quinlan for nothing.

Taking a deep breath, Haylen walked inside of the small bunker and looked around at the wreckage of the lobby. The place had seen better days for sure, but... nothing a little loving touch couldn't fix- _maybe_. If anything, it seemed like it had been bypassed by looters- so maybe she'd find something good in here after all.

But that wasn't her plan here- _focus Haylen._

Her eyes were drawn to the nearby terminal, the only working thing in the lobby, and Haylen recalled back on the conversation she had had with Nora nearly a week prior.

 _"- we reprogrammed the surface terminal with an access code that can't be hacked, so he's got full control from the bunker."_

With an incognito call that had been made days prior, Haylen moved slowly towards the computer, and briefly tapped her fingers against the dusty keyboard- watching as the green screen lit up, and awaited a password.

Her fingers carefully moved across the keyboard as she inputted the awaited code, and directed power back to the elevator; she heard it briefly ding behind her in confirmation.

 _"The password is: United We Stand- hey, don't laugh at it!"_

Haylen waited as the elevator rattled its way up to the lobby, before the rustic doors finally opened- welcoming her into the small, white cube. She felt nervous just stepping inside of it- and even more so as she hit the button that would take her to the lower floor.

That would hopefully take her to Danse.

...

Her stomach was in knots the entire ride down.

Her fingers fiddled with the straps on her vest- afraid that if she didn't keep them preoccupied, she might try to claw her way back to the lobby.

When the elevator finally came to a short, jolted stop, Haylen thought she was going to throw up.

And then the doors opened, and she found herself stepping into the underground bunker on shaking legs that attempted to buckle at the knees.

"... Haylen?"


	2. Listening Post Bravo

Haylen stilled at the hesitant call of her name, and felt her body almost shiver in response to it.

She didn't need to look up in order to recognize the voice; she recognized the heaviness in his words, the accented way he spoke... All it took was a single word, her name of all things, and it felt like she had already been floored.

Just a few seconds of hesitation felt like hours before she slowly looked up to pin the voice to a face.

...

In the confines of the small bunker, the breathless gasp that left her sounded more like a nuclear bomb going off outside.

It felt like she stumbled out of the elevator on legs that could barely walk- legs that were shaking so bad, she was certain she was three seconds away from busting her face on the floor. She tried to keep most of it... under control, tried to save face and keep her calm demeanor intact, but it was difficult.

It was hard to walk into the bunker and see him standing just a few feet from her, looking every bit of the man she remembered- looking like nothing had changed at all; the only difference worth mentioning was the absence of his power armor- which she could count on one hand the amount of times she had seen him outside of it.

"Oh God," Haylen whispered, hearing her voice crack just ever so slightly, despite her best attempts to keep it under control. Part of her felt as though she still needed to maintain her face, her professionalism; she couldn't quite break the habit of seeing him as her superior, even if... No, now was not the time to think about it. She just wanted to savor this feeling of relief, this overwhelming feeling of near joy that she was able to see him again. After listening to the rumors that spread first, and then dealing with Nora and Proctor Quinlan, and then Elder Maxson... After everything the Brotherhood had said and done, she was still able to see him face to face- unharmed.

And as she reached out for him, catching her hands against his arms, squeezing them briefly in her shallow hold... she was still able to touch him. She was able to have physical reassurance that he was here, and alive, and... with the strong possibility that no one would hurt him.

She was and wasn't every bit embarrassed to admit that she could feel tears welling up in her eyes.

"You're alive... Christ, you're really alive."

She hardly noticed that he didn't seem to share even the slightest hint of a reaction- hardly showed anything even remotely close to what she was expressing. But it came to no surprise; he rarely showed many outward expressions, and even then... he had no reasons to worry over her like she had with him.

"What are you doing here?" Danse questioned.

It was hardly... the reaction she was expecting, not that she had really been expecting much of one.

Still, the hint of confusion that dressed his heavy features put everything she had been feeling to a halt.

Haylen loosened her grip on his arms and tried to ignore the sudden churning in her stomach. "What do you mean?" she pressed. "Nora said that she told you that I was coming, and that there wouldn't be an issue. Did she... did she not get in contact with you?"

"No, no, she did, I just..." he quickly corrected, only to stop himself before he finished. He seemed to hesitate with his words, unsure of what to say next, which was... unlike him. She noticed the way he briefly looked away from her- and noted that when he did eventually speak again, his voice was low and uncertain. "I didn't think that you'd actually come."

...

It felt like someone had stabbed her through the chest, or that she had stepped on a land mine of some sort.

Just a few words, and it felt like her entire body ran cold.

Fingers curled briefly into the orange material of his suit, more so out of a need for her own sense of control. Words failed her at first, and for a moment, she was glad that he wasn't looking at her directly- maybe then he wouldn't see the sheer pain his words had put through her.

It was only a mere fraction of what he was going through though- and even then, a fraction was maybe too big of an estimate.

Still, she tried to muster up what little of a smile she could. Years of hard work in the field, patching people up and assuring the dying that they would be okay had given her a decent enough poker face. "Hey, you're still the same Danse that I knew before," Haylen spoke, hoping she sounded as reassuring as she tried be- as she wanted to be. "Just because..." her own words seemed to stutter together on her tongue, but she had to finish them- she had to commit to them, "just because you're a Synth doesn't mean anything has changed-"

"Everything _has_ changed, Haylen," he interrupted, as he brushed her hands away from him. It was hard to ignore the combination of anger and hurt that had been strung together in his tone.

"Not for me it hasn't," she started, hoping to regain some sense of ground.

"But it has for me."

It felt like the pit of her stomach had been ripped open again.

She tried to think of something, anything, to say in response, but... her mind continued to run through blanks; it felt like if she so much as tried to open her mouth, not only would the wrong thing come out, she might even throw up too.

Of all their years working together, working under his command, she had never seen him this utterly beaten down before. Not even when their first days spent in the Commonwealth was filled with nothing but death and disaster. Not even when things were going to Hell so fast, they weren't even sure if they'd be able to hold out until the Prydwen's arrival.

But all of that, all that time spent in the Capital Wasteland, all those years traveling to the Commonwealth... for him, it was all a lie. She had heard the stories from his past many times before, and had always found an odd sense of inspiration in them- in the way he held out in a world like this. She enjoyed hearing the spark in his voice when he recounted the first time he heard about the Brotherhood, and how he had joined up the first chance he got; how he looked for a better future for himself, and for the world around him. There was always so much life in the way he told those stories, from his first patrol, to making the decision to leave the Wasteland for the Commonwealth.

... But all of that was gone now.

All of those stories, those memories, all manufactured in a computer.

Sure, to her, he showed no difference- physically or mentally.

But to him... Everything that had made him who he was, was gone now. Everything that he had lived for, everything that he had worked for, was gone- knocked down and scattered aside like ashes from an old furnace.

...

She was a Scribe, a glorified field medic to some extent.

She knew how to patch someone up, how to fix someone... how to possibly bring someone back from the brink of death- or at least do everything in her power to do so; and if that failed, then she knew how to give them a comfortable, and pain-free death.

But there was nothing in her wealth of experience that would help her help him now.

Danse always kept his cards close to his chest, never outwardly showing anything more than he needed to. It was just how he was, and when they were out in the field, it worked perfectly. But... no matter where they were, whether it was the police station, or the Prydwen itself, he kept that same collective face.

Even now... there was little more than what he wanted to show her.

He used his dedication to the Brotherhood, to Elder Maxson, to continue pushing forward with work that needed to be done- it was his outlet to get through the things he needed to get through.

But... there was no outlet for him now.

Just bitter disgust and anger over something he couldn't control.

"I'm sorry."

The words tumbled out of her before she could stop them. They felt so little in her chest, and even smaller out in the open... That was the best she could say to him? After everything that had happened, after realizing the pain, and anger, and torment he was going through, that was all that she could offer?

And as damning as it felt, it was.

... But she put everything into those two words. Every bit of heartache and crushing pain that had been following her from the moment Maxson found out about M7-97, from the moment she saw his holotags, even up until now. She had to come to terms that there was virtually nothing she could say that would do anything meaningful in this kind of situation; she had to come to terms that she couldn't help this, she couldn't patch this situation up and hope that it would be better in the morning.

And yet... those two words seemed to have a bigger impact on him than she had thought, than she had anticipated.

He was quiet, but she could see his face tense slightly- she could see the pull of his jaw, and the twitching that had now settled on the corners of his lips. He looked sort of confused, as though unsure of how to take her words exactly, and yet there was a hint of him being relieved and happy to hear them at the same time. It was a look that didn't pass him all too often- one that she cherished when she could.

Danse seemed to hesitate, almost giving it second thoughts, before he slowly moved one hand to her shoulder, and lightly squeezed it. "Thanks Haylen," he started, his quiet voice giving away his sense of sheer relief.

She felt herself smile lightly at the gesture, knowing it was the best attempt he normally gave at physical contact. Well, not the best attempt, but the more common one- the one he didn't mind giving out on a daily basis. But... as little of a gesture as it was, it gave her some reassurance that he was going to be okay- that he was a tough sonofabitch, and that he could get through this, one way or another.

"You should head back to the police station before someone sees you out there."

...

And just like that, the fragile illusion was gone.

For just a split second, she was convinced that everything was okay.

She was convinced that he wasn't currently wanted by the Brotherhood, that he hadn't been deemed a traitor, or an infiltrator from the Institute. She was convinced that he only had one name, and it didn't consist of a letter and three numbers.

"And so what if they do?" Haylen whispered- although she knew the full answer herself.

His grip on her shoulder loosened for a second, as though he couldn't quite understand her question. "You'll be expunged just the same," Danse started, "and I am not risking your life, or your standing with the Brotherhood."

Haylen watched him carefully, taking hint of his firm words, and the undertone of concern in his voice. He was always looking out for everyone, always trying to do everything he could to keep things from falling apart- never really protecting himself from that same danger.

He wanted her to be safe, to continue what she was doing, and the only way that would happen... was if she stayed with the Brotherhood, if she abandoned him.

"So let them do it."

"Haylen-"

"No, I'm... I'm tired of this," she interrupted, her voice only now starting to catch up with her. She knew he was only doing what he thought was best for her, but... he didn't know- he didn't know that she was starting to dream about leaving instead. "You did everything for them. You did everything right, and when you needed your brothers and sisters the most... they turned their backs on you- we all did. All over something that you couldn't even control." her jaw clenched slightly as she heard her voice give, still not quite as strong as she wanted it to be. She wasn't even aware that she had been partly jabbing him in the chest with one finger as the words came out of her- almost moving the two in the same, offset rhythm. "It's not right Danse, and you can't convince me otherwise."

... The look on his face told her that he was overwhelmed by her sudden outburst; those dark eyes of his had slightly widened, and his pale lips had parted in surprise. She had caught him off-guard.

He had never even considered that she would fly to his defense over it.

And for a moment, it occurred to her that he didn't even see the Brotherhood as the bad guys. He didn't even consider that maybe this was inhumane, or that maybe he deserved better than total abandonment.

"Haylen," his voice was oddly soft, but firm, much like it usually was when he gave commands, "you are an established, and well-decorated member of the Brotherhood, you should be proud-"

"Well I'm not!" she snapped, as she pulled herself from his grip- throwing her shoulder back a little too hard, a little too fast. "And why should I be? We're nothing more than... Hell, Danse, we're no better than the Institute at this point."

And right then, it looked like she had sucker punched him right in the gut- knocking every breath of air right out of him. His hand remained slightly perched in mid-air, fingers partly curled as though they were on still on her shoulder; but it didn't take long before they quickly clenched together and he snapped his arm back to his side.

She knew the words were going to hurt him the moment they left her, and yet she had said them anyways.

"Haylen!"

Her heart was absolutely rocketing in her chest now, and she could almost hear the blood pounding in her ears.

She found herself suddenly restless, and almost panicky- like she couldn't control the overshot nerves that tingled heat and pain in the tips of her fingers.

... She couldn't look at him- couldn't look at the way she was tearing him down.

"Look at what the Brotherhood is doing," she continued on regardless, as she pushed herself away from him and walked further into the bunker. She didn't know where exactly she was going to go, this place wasn't all that big to begin with, but she just had to keep moving. "We take all of this useful tech, and we horde it for ourselves- and we kill anyone who doesn't agree with us on sight. We have the Prydwen, but for some reason we can't help the people of the Commonwealth get clean water? Because that's not what our goal here is? The only reason we came here was to fight the Institute, and the only reason we're doing that is because they create Synths- they create robots. And if that's the case, then tell me what the hell Liberty Prime is."

Her voice wavered as she spoke, but she wasn't sure if it was from her wired nerves, or the venom in her words. She went through hell, and came out all this way to find him, only going off the assumption that Nora's word was right. It could've been a trap- the Paladin could've used it to prove her disloyalty to the Brotherhood, and have her expunged just the same.

But it wasn't.

Danse was here; he was alive and safe.

She came all the way out here to see him, to get that confirmation... and all she was doing now was fighting him- hurting him. Dragging him down into the same fractured, betrayed pit that she was going insane in- not that he really needed her; he was already there after all.

"Liberty Prime is a robot who's only reason for being created was so that he could be controlled- so that he could destroy the Brotherhood's enemies. Now tell me just how that's any different from the Synths that Elder Maxson is so passionate about?"

...

Silence.

She couldn't even bring herself to look back at him, to see what he was doing, or how he was reacting.

She couldn't bare to see how she was only making his own situation even worse.

But Pandora's box was already open, and she couldn't just close it again with a clean conscious. She couldn't go back to that police station under the notion that it was all going to be okay- and that she should just forget everything and live by the rules.

That wasn't who she was.

She fought for every day of her life; she fought for people who couldn't fight- fought to keep them alive even when death had already wrung their necks. Maybe it was a sense of dedication, or maybe just a stubborn streak that refused to lose.

She had yet to have a chance to mourn what had happened, to realize that things were going to be so drastically different. She had pushed herself through it all, focusing on work, and pretending that everything was okay- using a self-medicative process to convince herself not to crack under pressure.

Shaking hands cupped themselves over the back of her neck, as she lingered with every step- suddenly feeling the bunker turning even smaller around her. "It's not fair, Danse," Haylen started, her voice quieter now. "It's not fair that... just because you were created in some lab, you can't be anything more than a pointless killing machine. You lead on principle, you risked your life for your brothers and sisters- you risked your life for Elder Maxson. I've seen you at your worst, and you were still the strongest person I knew- the strongest person I have ever had the honor of fighting alongside. And now... just because you have some kind of chip in your head, you can't be that same person?"

... Still nothing.

She expected as much.

Why the hell did she even come down here?

Haylen gave out a heavy sigh, and planted her hands down on a nearby dusty, outdated console- dropping her head down against her chest. "They say you're incapable of anything, of feeling emotions, but... I know it's not true. I've witnessed you firsthand express everything a soldier should in battle. No one can convince me that you didn't feel guilt, that you didn't mourn Keane, Dawes, Warwick, or Brach. That you didn't feel fear when you saw Rhys go down too, or that you didn't feel relief when he got back up, bruised and battered, but alive. No one can convince me that it was all fake, that it was just some elaborate play to make you fit in."

Her body physically ached now- and she was certain that it wasn't just from the near eight hour walk it took to get here.

"You're not a liar, Danse. And I won't let anyone so much as try to tell me otherwise."

...

Maybe she should've taken Nora's advice and waited longer.

She was not in the... emotional state, or capacity, to handle this; all this time she had worried that he wouldn't be able to cope, when in reality, she couldn't either. But she had things she needed to tell him, things she wanted him to know- even if he wasn't in the mindset to believe any of it.

At the very least, when he was ready to look the issue in the eye, maybe he would remember this.

And maybe, just maybe, he'd believe it too.

The heavy chested sigh that left her sounded like it filled the bunker, echoing off the broken concrete walls just so it could come back to haunt her. Fingers reached up and stripped her helmet off, before she dropped it onto the console in front of her. She could feel the slight pounding of a headache coming on as she ran her fingers through her red hair- feeling how it a few strands had already pulled loose from her band.

"... When Nora convinced me not to pull the trigger myself, she inadvertently did so by mentioning you."

Haylen lifted her head at his voice, before she slowly turned around- only to see that Danse hadn't moved the slightest from before. She could see the stiffness in his shoulders though, the tension that strung across his back and trembled in his clenched hands.

"She reminded me that there were still people out there who cared, and that... they would fight for me- that they would care if something happened to me," Danse continued, his voice set in its usual calm, steady tone. "I just... I assumed she was lying- that she was just saying whatever she needed to to convince me otherwise. And it worked- for a short while. As soon as Elder Maxson left, and the whole thing was officially over, I started to have my doubts; I started to think that I should've just taken the bullet when it was offered. Because... what was the point? Everything that I was, that I am, it's all just programming- and at any time, that programming could change, and I would be an entirely different person."

Her fingers curled against the flat of the console, pressing hard and painful against the metal surface.

"But... whether you intended to, or not, you are proving Nora's point," he finished. "You are proving that... maybe I'm not alone in this."

The weight of his words hit her hard, making her glad that she was holding onto the console behind her.

"There is no maybe in this," Haylen started, catching the way he slightly turned his head towards her, before he slowly followed through the motion with the rest of his body. Something about seeing him face-to-face made her feel like she was making more of an impact, made her feel like he was coming back around to his old self. Pushing herself to her feet, she slowly walked back over to him, and moved one hand to hesitantly take his- feeling the way his fingers unclenched at the motion, feeling the way his fingers drifted between her own. "I won't let you be alone here."

...

For the first time since she had been here, there seemed to be the slight hint of a smile on his lips.

And it was a start- abet a small one, but it meant that things could finally progress from here.

"I guess I'll have to take your word for it then."

She managed a quiet laugh- if anything, she was just... happy that there was a possibility here; that maybe through all of this hell, there was a silver lining to be found- a new future for him. Even if she had made a fool of herself once again, it was a well-worthy sacrifice. It was a good feeling, one that eased away her strung out nerves, and the churning in her stomach.

Haylen leaned in against him, hooking her free arm around his back as she rested her head on his chest. There were a few seconds of hesitation, before Danse slowly wrapped his arm around her in return- holding her to him. He very rarely gave into physical gestures, asides from a hand on the shoulder, or a pat on the back, but this felt... natural. He had held her before, and even though this was in an entirely different context, it was still comforting just the same.

She felt the way his chest moved against her, and almost heard the subtle beating of the heart tucked away under his ribs. There was no mechanical whirring, or circuits popping inside of him...

No, he had a real heart.

A human heart.

He might've been machine, but he was real.

There wasn't a single part of him that wasn't alive right now- that wasn't feeling something in this moment.

Whether it was comfort, relief... or something else.

She pulled away from the embrace first, feeling the way his hand seemed to squeeze hers in objection, while his arm fell away from her all too quickly. And she lingered on the way he looked at her, at the subtle hint of newfound confidence in his eyes- a hint of renewed faith.

And she leaned up to prove it, as she pressed her lips to his.

... For a second, or two, it didn't immediately occur to her that she had actually gone through with the action- it was always something she had thought of, but never had the guts to actually do. And while she would've liked to have blamed it on being caught up in the moment, she knew she couldn't. This wasn't a spontaneous action- well, not in all of its entirety.

But considering that he didn't immediately jerk away from her... it seemed to hint that maybe she wasn't alone in that aspect.

However, it didn't take long before his hands moved to her shoulders as he eased her back- breaking the light kiss. And it was easy to see how much self control he was exerting- either by not giving into her, or by not throwing her completely aside.

"Haylen..." it seemed like that was the only word he could get out- and what another coincidence that it just happened to be her name. "I... I..."

They had shared close moments like this in the past, not that any of them had ever resulted in anything concrete like this- mainly because he always pulled himself away from the situation. He was her superior officer, and as such, he needed to be the responsible one. He always had to remember that relationships within units, especially in regards to lower officers, wasn't allowed. Anything that could distract them from the mission at hand was to be forbidden- unless otherwise started, or with permission granted.

The rules and regulations had never stopped her from imagining it though.

"Sorry," Haylen started, although that in itself might've been a partial lie; she wasn't really sorry for anything. "I just... I've been wanting to..."

They were both sharing these instances where... words seemed to deal more impact than they were expecting, more impact than expected. And while she had gotten him before, it appeared that she had gotten him once more.

There was some hesitation, no doubt him getting over the shock of her unfinished, but clear statement, before he leaned down and kissed her in return this time.

...

There was more of an impact with it this round.

Haylen felt his fingers push through her loosening hair, eventually tangling them in the thin red strands as he pulled her in against him- as she felt the force of his lips pressing back against her own.

It didn't take long before they were sharing the same breath, before her tongue was exploring his warm mouth and listening to the subtle moans he gave her in return. It didn't take long before he decided to lean further down to her, giving her back a much needed break as he matched her intensity- as he kissed her hard, and swept his tongue into her mouth, taking in every ounce of heat and taste.

She felt his arm hook around her waist, bracing itself against her lower back as he kept her anchored to him.

But just the same, it didn't take long before they fell apart.

Before she came back to the sound of her own breathing, her own subtle panting as her chest felt heavy underneath her armor. She could feel the heat in her face, and noticed the same flush that had come to his.

"I didn't- I mean, I wasn't sure if you felt the same," Danse started, stumbling over his words for a moment. It was easy to see the ongoing battle that was still turning the gears in his head. It was easy to see the way he didn't want to get ahead of himself- easy to see the way he wanted to give in, but didn't want to face rejection, or suffer a crash and burn. "Even though I'm a..." his voiced trailed, but as far as she was concerned, she didn't want to hear how it ended.

Haylen kissed him again, lingering on the warmth he left behind. "I don't care," she replied, "it doesn't bother me; it doesn't change who you are to me. You're no different than you were before. You're a Synth... so what? I acknowledge that, and I accept it, but it doesn't change a damn thing."

His arms were back around her as he partially lifted her into another embrace- and she heard herself moan softly at the way he held her, at the way he kissed her. At the heat and presence of him on her lips; at the utter sense of relief and near desperation that he kissed her with.

"Let me stay the night here," she whispered, as her hands moved to his broad shoulders- fingers toying with the thick straps on his uniform. "I don't... I don't want to leave you alone here- hell, I just don't want to leave you."

"Won't Rhys ask where you are?" he pressed.

Always a stickler for details.

"I told him I'd be on OP for a few days," Haylen answered. "Told him I was heading out to Med-Tek after tracking some frequencies, hoping to find something technology-worthy there. I ditched my radio, and everything up by the hospital to prove my word... I might stop by later to actually scope the place out."

Danse seemed to hesitate, before he moved one hand to brush aside the loose strands that had fallen into her face.

"... Okay."


	3. To the Mattresses

**A/N: I apologize for the delayed update- this was a hefty chapter to write.**

 **Just as a forewarning, this chapter does contain sexual content for those not interested- although there is a small story portion at the bottom. But for those who might be interested, there is a more explicit version on my AO3. I'll admit, I'm a weenie and I'm very hesitant to post anything explicit on FF, so this is a sort of cut up version of the AO3 version.**

* * *

Haylen had to admit that this might've been both the strangest, and hardest day she had been through.

From waking up in a boathouse, to trekking several miles across the Commonwealth, just to make it here- just so she could see him with her own two eyes. She played on faith and on the word of a woman who had a tendency of bouncing in and out of frame when needed be. She herself had never been one to play risks, at least not often, but this was a leap she had been willing to make.

And she was glad that she did.

 _"Are you sure about this?"_

 _"I told you I didn't want to leave you here."_

Otherwise she wouldn't have him here, right in front of her.

She wouldn't have his arms around her, his lips against hers, his fingers curled and clawed against her back.

She wouldn't be feeling the way his uniform wrinkled and crumbled underneath her hands as she slowly slid the orange fabric off of his shoulders. Fingers tugged the fitted material down his arms, eventually allowing him to work himself loose from it, before she bundled it down around his waist. As noted before, Danse was very rarely seen out of armor, but when he was... it was hard not to notice his strong physique; it was hard not to notice his broad, and heavy frame. Wide shoulders, and chest; thick abdomen and waist.

Her hands pressed against his bare chest, feeling the warmth of his skin, and the quickness of his heart against her palms.

 _"Are you okay with us...?"_

 _"... Yes."_

Hands that had always been hesitant to touch her followed her lead as he worked to rid her of her heavy vest. Danse had seen her put on and take off the armor plenty of times over, and seemed to mimic her technique.

He unbuckled the strap around her ribs first, before he loosened the straps over her shoulders, and pulled the heavy utility apron off. His fingers stripped off her belt next, before he undid the buckles running down the front of her vest- eventually working that off of her shoulders as well and dropping it to the ground. It landed heavy on the floor around her feet, making her realize just how much the vest alone had weighed her down.

It felt like a weight had quite literally been lifted off of her shoulders.

And it left her in just the red sweater underneath it, which now felt too hot against her skin.

Without breaking from her lips, Danse pushed her back towards the elevator, and eventually up against the wall- using his body to cement her to it. His hands grabbed at the hem of her sweater and tugged it up against her abdomen- forcing her to pull away from him long enough to yank the whole thing over her head and throw it aside. He kissed her hard in the aftermath; his hands grabbing and squeezing at her waist as he pulled her in against him.

And it was all too easy to feel him through the flight suit, feeling the way he grew harder against her. It was a... _presence_ she was used to, either at the police station, or even on the Prydwen those few times- but never from him.

Relationships in the Brotherhood were forbidden, yes.

But what two officers did when no one was looking, or under the cover of a paid watch-out, did not technically classify as a relationship.

It was different when patrolling on a base, or within a compound, but... stick a couple dozen people in a flying airship with little to no stops, and... things happened. Officers got bored, or stressed, and while bouncing under the covers was labeled as a distraction to the mission at hand, so was working with no breaks or any sort of releases. Sometimes all someone needed was a quick ten-minute relief from stress, and they were back to working at a hundred precent again.

Sure, it wasn't sanitary, or glamorous a lot of the times.

But Haylen had had her fair share of fingers and mouths between her legs in the dust of a supply closet to no longer care for such matters.

And considering how well Danse was handling her... perhaps in his younger years of enrollment, he had done the same.

He tangled his fingers in her thin tank-top next, before it too was taken care of and removed.

The stagnant air of the bunker felt welcoming against her bare chest- although not nearly as welcoming as his hands against her breasts though; they were tender and sore from dealing with the weight and coarse material of her uniform. As well as from the sweat that had collected on them from the sun bearing down on her for most of the morning.

Danse had always worn gloves while on duty, saving his hands from growing rough callouses on them, which made them surprisingly soft against her breasts. Fingers circled around them, cupping and squeezing them in his palms- working them around in his grasp until she couldn't remember how they felt without his hands on them. He pressed against her nipples, rolling them around underneath the pads of his thumbs, and making them turn stiff with the steady caresses.

It felt nice.

It had been quite awhile since someone had last played with her breasts, mostly due to strict time constrictions; Haylen had almost forgotten how much she enjoyed it- _almost_.

She felt herself standing forward on her toes, lifting up and arching her back- pressing her chest into his hands. His lips were still tightly pressed to her own; his tongue swept across her mouth, keeping her thoroughly engaged as she felt her heart rate start to spike.

Shifting one leg forward, she wiggled it between his own before she pressed her thigh partly against his groin- and slowly began to rock it back and forth. She didn't bother biting back the grin that ached on her lips at the subtle groan that vibrated in his throat.

She didn't bother to even try and ignore the way he shifted his hips against her and moved them in counter to her rocking.

... It felt like her head was still spinning in regards to this whole thing.

One minute she was begging for his life, and the next, she thought it was too late- thought he was already dead.

And then came the twist that he was actually alive...

And now she was here, in a pre-war bunker, potentially about to have sex with him.

And she wouldn't trade it for a thing in this post-Apocalyptic world.

"Danse..." she whispered, as she felt him break away from her before he dipped his head into the curve of her neck. She shuddered at the feel of his warm lips and mouth against her skin- at the subtle graze of tongue and teeth. Her hands curled against his bare arms, feeling the heat of his skin in her grasp and feeling the way he slightly flexed at her touch.

She had to admit it had been awhile since she had last been touched like this- when it wasn't all taken in a rush to get back to her post on time.

But down there, there was no Brotherhood.

There were no posts, no schedules, no duty to attend to.

It was just the two of them.

And Haylen found that she rather liked it that way.

He paused slightly at her words, one hand skirting against her lower back, before he pulled away from her; his lips caught the back curve of her jaw as he did so, catching his warm breath against the shell of her ear. "I like the way that sounds," he replied.

Of course he did- he had to.

Haylen grinned before she turned her head enough to catch him by the lips. "Is that so?" she teased. "Then maybe you should keep making me say it."

He kissed her again, long and hard, wrapping her up in the whirlwind of his touch and scent.

So much so, she found herself too distracted by the embrace to even notice the way he shifted his body to lean down to her. Haylen felt his hands grab her by the backside, before he hoisted her up against him in one fluid motion- and without warning. She squealed slightly at the motion, feeling his arms quickly hook underneath her thighs to hold her to him, prompting her to dig her knees into his waist; her arms wrapped around his neck for added measure- not that she thought that he would drop her.

She had seen him carry plenty of people before after all.

Danse pulled her from the wall and walked with her across the bunker.

He carried her over to a nearby desk before he set her down on the edge of it. Reaching behind her, he managed to shove the adjoining broken terminal off with one push, causing it to clatter into pieces on the floor. She felt him pick her up by the hips in the aftermath, and slide her towards the center of the desk, before he eased her flat onto her back.

Hands and limbs released their hold on him as she felt her body go relaxed once more.

Haylen felt a sense of heat quickly stir up in her stomach as she felt him tug off her boots, and drop them aside, before his fingers went to unbuttoning her pants. Fingers curled underneath the loosened waistband, before his hands lifted her hips from the desk- just enough for him to tug both her pants and underwear off of her waist. He carefully pulled the pair down to her thighs; his warm fingertips brushing against her flushed skin the entire time, trailing all the way down to her knees.

It felt like her head was swimming again as she watched Danse work- eventually helping to kick her pants off, and watching as he tossed them aside as well.

She shuddered at the now cool air that breezed between her legs, and became very well aware of just how aroused she had gotten; she could feel herself practically dripping onto the desk below.

She met him halfway as he moved to kiss her once more, arms draped over the back of his neck before she pulled him down to her- covering her body with his own. His hands grabbed at her ribs, allowing the curve of them to press into his palms as he held her. She could feel the heat and weight of his chest on hers; she could feel the staggered breaths between them.

Feel the erratic pulsing of hearts that beated in time to one another.

"This is crazy," Danse whispered, brushing his lips against her jaw before he dipped down to curve of her shoulder.

"It is," Haylen agreed, as if that alone would even skirt the tip of this iceberg they had. Understatement of the year potentially. But she tried not to dwell entirely on it; she wanted to stay focused on his skin against hers and the subtle way he was trying to get a grasp on his breathing. "But, believe it or not, this is not the worst place that I've gotten laid in."

He offered a quiet, loose chuckle as one hand moved to brush against her back; his fingers curling against her spine. She had no doubts that this wasn't the worst place for him either- although still highly unexpected, which was a feeling that she too shared. "You're making me feel a lot of things right now, Haylen- a lot of real things."

Human things.

To her, he was barely robot.

But to him, he felt barely human anymore.

Maxson had really fucked with his head, but she... she wasn't going to let him live like that. She wasn't going to let him live like he was some kind of abomination- like he didn't deserve the same kind of happiness everyone else had.

Like he didn't deserve this kind of happiness.

"Good," she replied, as she pressed her hands against his chest, feeling the way he managed to calm his breathing. "It's a good reason not to stop- we wouldn't want to lose that feeling after all." she felt his head turn as he pressed his lips against her neck, causing her to lean into the touch. "You know what I'm feeling right now?"

"What's that?"

"A little cold," Haylen answered, trailing her fingertips down his torso, before she slowly pushed him back, "a little... left out."

She emphasized her point by tugging at the uniform that was still bundled around his waist- and heard him laugh in response to it, before he swept her into another kiss. She could feel the brief smile on his lips and matched it with her own.

"Point taken."

She watched as Danse straighten up, before he quickly discarded his boots; she sat up herself to help tug his uniform off of his hips, and slowly pushed it down against his thighs. She took in the heat of his skin against her fingers and admired the muscles that twitched underneath her touch.

It didn't take long for him to pull the rest of the uniform off, before he kicked it aside- leaving the both of them in bare skin.

And when she saw him fully naked- saw his broad shoulders, and chest; his narrow waist and hips, followed by thick thighs and calves... Haylen supposed the Brotherhood was good for something. And maybe the Institute too- if only for this one man.

 _"Mankind. Re-defined,"_ Nora had once mocked under her breath, muttering something about a damn scientist and his stupid lab.

And yeah, Haylen could see it.

Fingers trailed down his chest, and down to his abdomen, before she stopped to linger on the heat of his lips against her shoulder once more.

She didn't linger long though as she slowly grazed her fingertips against his cock- feeling the way he shuddered and twitched in response.

"Do you want to finish this?" she posed.

"Yes," Danse whispered, a breathy kind of answer, as he drew her into a kiss. His hands moved back to the desk, before they moved to her thighs and slowly skirted palms down to her knees- which he curled his fingers underneath.

Her legs moved on their own, but were guided by his hands as she hooked her knees against his hips once more.

Haylen shuddered as she felt the less-than-subtle graze of his cock between her legs, before she reached down and wrapped her fingers around him; she heard him groan in response and almost shivered at the sound. She took advantage of it and made slow strokes against him with her fingers- rubbing the pads of them over the tip of him. "Are you ready?" she questioned.

"As long as you are."

Danse rubbed against her, lips peppering hers softly, before he moved forward.

She quietly gasped as she felt him push into her, feeling the way her body stretched around him- although it was all the more welcoming to his presence. He moaned softly against her lips as his hands squeezed at her partly lifted thighs.

Her hands moved to curl against the edge of the desk, providing extra stability.

Her knees pressed against his hips as she let the sensations pool through her, before she slowly wrapped her legs around his waist- using them to usher him forward.

"Haylen," he whispered, as his hands moved to the back of her hips, anchoring them, as he pulled himself to her. He could feel the warmth of her body slowly engulfing him, and it was utterly mind-numbing. "D-damn... you feel good."

She bit into her lip this time, but managed a quiet laugh as she coaxed him closer. "You're not... too bad yourself," she replied, groaning softly as he eased himself into a slower pace, allowing her to take the thickest portion of him in careful gestures. He was thicker than she had previously thought, but her body was all the more prepared; she hardly noticed the way he filled her more than most did- there was little to no straining. "G-godamn..." she muttered, as she leaned away and let her head fall slightly back as he completely filled her- as she felt his hips firmly snug between her thighs.

There was no need to rush here, which might've been why they took it as slow as they did.

It was a rarity for them to get a chance like this... might as well take advantage of it while they could.

He was breathing quick as he stopped to savor her heat and body, savor the moment, before he slowly started to move again- gently testing her.

Haylen let out a shuddered breath as every little movement struck nerves all over her, sending warm sensations down to the tips of every finger and toe.

"I'm not hurting you, am I?" Danse questioned, as he stopped to await her answer.

"Far from it," she assured, before one hand moved to the back of his neck and pulled him down to her. "Now please... don't stop again."

He leaned in and kissed her once again, sweeping her up into his touch, and keeping her close as he slowly began thrusting into her.

Her fingers continued to curl and dig into the desk as she felt the easy way he moved inside of her now, as she felt his quick thrusts work with her. She could hear herself breathing hard at the way her hips partly slid back and forth against the desk- moving by his force alone. His fingers pressed against the back of her hips, continuing to hold her steady until he found a rhythm that worked for the both of them; his hands eventually moved to the desk for better stability once it had been established.

Haylen felt his head dip against her neck and moaned softly at the way he nipped and kissed at her skin- feeling the warmth and wetness of his mouth every time he touched her.

Tilting her head to one side, he moved into the curve of her neck and steadily worked his way down to her collarbones.

Her back arched forward towards him as he teased her breast once again; his tongue stroking and rubbing at her nipples in passes.

... He felt hot between her legs.

She could feel every movement of him.

She could feel the way her body shuddered with his thrusts, and feel the way she shivered as he rubbed against her spot of collective nerves. It was hard not to let her hips jolt with every contact- feeling him purposely rub against that spot every time he pulled out.

Haylen let her eyes drift down to the action of his hips between her thighs. She could see the red flush of her skin, and watched the way he disappeared into her again and again- something about watching it made it much more pleasurable. There was something about being able to see him, and realize that this wasn't just some kind of dream, or fantasy.

Danse moved his arms to tie around her midsection, before he used his body to press her flat against the desk once more- holding her down with his body weight alone. But she'd be damned if he wasn't warm, and if it didn't bring him closer to her as she felt his thrusts connect deeper with her. She felt each thrust vibrate in her hips and against the desk, sending hard aftershocks up her spine.

She groaned softly and wrapped her legs around his midsection, before she dug her heels into his lower back- using them to guide his hips down into her. Burying her head into his shoulder, she took in the faint hint of sweat on his skin as fingers dug into the back of his shoulders.

She heard the stammered gasps and moans that escaped her as he struck the right spot every time he thrusted into her.

It lit her body on fire and made it feel almost too heavy to move as her legs bounced against his waist.

"I... oh God," Haylen muttered, tilting her head back to draw in fresh air as she felt his thrusts connecting more rapidly now. "Fuck, Danse... don't stop."

His arms squeezed hard around her as he took in ragged breaths against her neck.

She held tight to him, arms and legs clinging to him, as she felt him manage a few more thrusts before she felt his body give into a heavy shudder as he came into her. And she wasn't too far behind as her body squirmed at the warmth he spilled into her.

Fingers clung to his skin as she felt her body tremble underneath his weight, hips pressing and seizing underneath his with her own finish.

...

She could've given him hell for not pulling out, but after a performance like that, shit... she didn't care anymore.

They laid there, breathing hard, and not releasing one another for several minutes at least- taking in hot, wet skin that shivered with every hot, choppy breath that passed against it.

It took him some time before he slowly pushed himself up, unfolding his arms out from underneath her, before he carefully pulled himself out of her. She groaned softly at the motion, feeling the ache return between her legs, suddenly quite aware of his absence; and she cringed as she felt the liquid dripping out of her- making another mess between her thighs.

She felt his eyes lingering on her as she reclaimed her limbs and tried to find some comfortable place to prop her legs; they were sore and heavy, but the heat of her thighs needed to be cooled down first. She probably didn't exactly look like the model Brotherhood Scribe right now, but... at least she never looked too bad post-coitus.

"Sorry," Danse managed to breathe, as he moved one hand to brush across his brow, before he slowly ran it down his face. "I uh... I'm pretty certain I'm sterile, but-"

Haylen gave a light laugh before she moved her arms to bring him back down to her- brushing her lips against his flushed cheek. "Honestly... I don't care," she replied, feeling the heat of his breath pool into the curve of her neck.

Synths more than likely couldn't reproduce, even as human-like as they were- there were some things that science just couldn't replicate. And being sterile or infertile wouldn't necessarily stick out in a world like this; there were a few people in the Brotherhood who were unable to reproduce- mostly because of radiation though.

And speaking of, this wouldn't be the first time someone got caught up in the moment and didn't take the necessary precautions. She was guilty of it too, but the problem was at least easy to take care of.

He matched her tired laugh, before he wrapped one arm around her and slowly pulled her up with him. "It's better to be safe," he insisted.

Haylen groaned at the motion, but allowed him to pull her up anyways. It took her a few seconds to regain movement and feeling back into her limbs, before she chanced the effort to ease herself back onto her feet. Her legs felt weak, and it felt a little weird to have to support herself again, but... it was doable. It was like walking during the aftershock of an explosion, where things just didn't feel like they could move.

"Don't laugh," she warned, as she walked back to where her supply vest had been dumped- very well aware of the slight hobble she walked with.

"Don't see why I would," Danse replied. "It's a sign of a job well done."

She snorted back a laugh- the cocky bastard.

Stooping down to pick up her vest, she tossed it onto the stacked crates nearby and fumbled through her multitude of pockets. It didn't take her long before she pulled out two of her water bottles that she had packed for the road. She tossed one of the bottles to him, before she stepped back around the short corner for some minor privacy. Her heart was still racing, but thankfully everything else had cooled down considerably. She bounced slightly on the balls of her feet to get the remaining bit of numbness out of her legs as she tried to stretch them out as she walked.

Haylen poured some of the water over her head, letting it run down her neck and back, before she carefully used it to clean herself out as well. It was a little annoying, and somewhat embarrassing to do- but at least it was easy. Not to mention, for safety sake, it had to be done. Thankfully most of it had already dribbled back out and down her thighs.

Once she was finished, she dried herself off and loosely re-dressed in her scattered clothing- choosing to forgo her vest, sweater, and boots for now; although she still stacked them on the broken console nearby. She stifled a quiet yawn and walked over to where he had partly re-dressed as well. His uniform was back on, but it was kept bundled around his waist for the time being- no doubt he was still trying to cool off.

"Mind if I crash for awhile?" she remarked, as she rolled her neck, before she pulled herself into a stretch. "I need to recharge a little."

"Not surprised," he started, looking as though he was about to make a gesture as to what they had just finished doing, before he changed his mind. "It was a long walk to get here- you're probably exhausted."

Oh right.

Hell, even she had completely forgotten about the travel she had made earlier that day.

"Come on," he offered, as he ushered for her to follow him- in which she grabbed him by the hand first and let him lead the way.

He walked her back across the bunker and through what looked to be a collapsed wall in the far corner, which exposed them to a small cave system. Haylen made a mental note to check it out more before she left; it didn't look all that big, so it wouldn't take long to explore. She followed him along the cave wall up unto another collapsed portion, which lead them back into the bunker and into the previously sealed off room. She had to admit she wondered how one would get back here- and at best, she figured she could always just break the viewing window and slide in.

The room had been suitable fitted with supplies and such for a temporary stay.

It was a sight that reminded her of her scavenging days- although this was better than any of her previous set ups.

At least he had a mattress; it was always a hit or miss if she ever found one.

Stretching again, Haylen walked around the small room before she welcomed herself to the mattress. She took up only half of it at first, before she decided to roll into the middle- gesturing for him to join her.

Danse chuckled and moved to do so at her bidding- wrapping her up in his arms and pulling her in close to him.

She took in the solidarity of the room, and the heat of him against her once more- taking in their combined weight as they fell and leaned into one another. It offered a sense of comfort that she hadn't felt in a long time; a sense of solace that felt all too distant these days.

... This place wasn't nearly as refined as the Prydwen, or even the police station, but it had him here.

And considering this was the only place for him, where he could be himself and be safe, at least until this whole thing blew over, then she'd prefer to be here above all the other places.

"Let me ask you something," Haylen started, feeling the way he tucked his head into the curve of her shoulder, while one arm laid out across her abdomen. "What if you... and I stayed here? Together?"

She felt him tense slightly at the words.

It wasn't exactly the greatest conversation to have at this point in time, but... their emotions and spirits were loose. Pillow talk was kind of like honesty hour- there were no filters and everyone spoke from their heart. And right now, she just... she had a lot more to get off her chest.

"Haylen, if you're still talking about leaving-"

"You can't change my mind," she interrupted, knowing full well that that was where he was going with it. "I wasn't lying before when I said I was tired of the Brotherhood- tired of Elder Maxson. We're not doing the Commonwealth any good- if anything, we're ruining it. I just... this is an easy way for me to leave, and I want to take it." she paused slightly, spearing her speech with a tired sigh. "I just, I need to- the Brotherhood isn't for me anymore, and it's better if I leave now. And... if you want to come with me, I won't stop you."

He laid there next to her in absolute silence- looking her over as though hoping she might come out and tell him that it was all just a bad joke; that it was all just a little post-coitus laugh.

But it wasn't.

Danse gave out a heavy sigh and closed his eyes, resting his head back against her shoulder. "You're making this difficult for me, Haylen..."

She knew she was.

To him, this was probably the last thing he needed.

But to her... she knew this was right.

Again, she wasn't going to leave him alone here. And with the Brotherhood involved, it would be too dangerous for her to be around him- and she would not be the reason for him getting caught.

"It's funny, you know," Haylen started, as she brushed her fingers through his thick hair. "When I first joined the Brotherhood, I thought I had finally found the place where I belonged. I used to be a wanderer, a scavenger, just kind of living day by day, and still hoping for the best. But I was so tired of being alone all the time, of never being able to trust anyone, and never doing anything about the future. But when I enlisted... I thought I had finally found the people I could be with, and a cause I could fight for. But now... after witnessing the past few years kind of flash before me, now I'd give anything to just go back to being on my own- wandering around by myself. And I think I'm ready to. I mean, hell, I'm better equipped now than I was before, and there's a safety net of people here. I could do wonders- maybe even set up my own clinic and give back to the Commonwealth for once."

He remained quiet beside her; his fingers briefly twitching against her side as they curled and uncurled against her- tangling in her thin tank top.

"You're crazy."

She gave a tired laugh at the words. "I figured you'd say something like that."

Danse pushed himself up onto his forearm and looked down at her. "You're crazy if you think I'm going to let you wander around the Commonwealth alone," he elaborated. "This is a dangerous place for... well, for someone like me- and it's equally as dangerous for someone like you too. And if you say I can't change your mind, then I can't change it- and I know that. So the least... the least I can do is go along with your crazy plan and just make sure you don't get yourself killed some way."

She waited a few seconds to let the words register and sink in.

To take in the genuine sense of concern in his voice and in his eyes.

To take in the way he looked at her with genuine respect.

A light smile found its way to her lips before Haylen pushed herself up and softly kissed him. "Thank you."

"You can't just... walk away though," Danse reminded. "It'll draw too much suspicion, and they might come after you."

Right.

First Danse 'disappears' and then another person on his team goes missing as well... It might draw unneeded questions and investigations. Proctor Quinlan already knew about her outburst over Danse, so he might lead the clues on connecting the pieces.

Not to mention, Maxson might go after Nora as well if he so much as got a hint that she was in on this.

And Nora might react badly to that kind of accusation- although it would be all in truth. After all, it was common knowledge that she had armed several of her settlements with artillery, courtesy of the Minutemen. And it was common knowledge that each piece of artillery had been placed in those settlements that had a clean view of the Prydwen.

Although the woman would heavily deny that it had been done on purpose.

"No, of course not," Haylen replied, as she coaxed him back down onto the mattress with her. "There are a lot of possibilities though- the Commonwealth is a dangerous place; I could disappear on my next OP run, or... have feral ghouls eat the rest of my remains- the choices here are endless. Just give me some time; I'll think of something worthwhile- something that let us both get away." she paused slightly at her own words before she spoke once more. "Are you going to run with me?"

"At this point, you haven't given me a reason not to."


	4. Coastal Cottage

**A/N: A nice little bonus chapter to tie it all together. I want to say thanks to everyone who stuck around! I was surprised by the attention the story got- I kind of expected people to rip it apart because of the pairing, but it's nice to see that some people just want to see happy endings regardless. This was a fun exercise for me considering I had never written Haylen nor Danse before- and I still have some work I need to do on their characterizations. But it just opens the door for more stories in the future.**

* * *

Haylen smiled as she watched the murky waves crash in against the beach- all from the dry safety of the rickety front porch.

The hint of salt in the air had never smelt so sweet to her before; she swore she could almost live the rest of her days listening to the waves as they broke in against the littered sand bar.

Once upon a time, back in the desolate Wasteland, she had absolutely despised any large body of water- whether it was a flooded town, or an overflowed lake- or even heavy rainfall. One too many trips into a flooded basement for supplies, and one too many nights spent hoping her base hadn't been washed away while she was gone would make the hate valid.

Not to mention, the wet, unhappy trudge to find a dry spot to take refuge in- only to have to wait days for her clothes to properly dry.

And wet socks.

Wet socks could drive any man crazy.

Not to mention the easy transportation of diseases into open wounds, potential of gangrene, and trench foot- the list could go on.

Hell, when the Prydwen landed over the Boston Airport, which had nearly sunk into the ocean itself, she refused to spend more than the necessary amount of time on it. She didn't so much as want to look at water unless it was in a clean bottle. Which was why the long trip from the Wasteland to the Commonwealth had been such a godsend for her- there was nothing but land as far as the eye could see.

But now... now her views on untamed water were a little different.

While Haylen had never saw herself living on the coast, next to radiated crashing waves, the location certainly had its own perks. The place was growing on her- after all, it was certainly better than any bunker, or police station- or flying airship for that matter.

Out here was utter isolation asides from the few Mirelurks who crept out every now and again- and even then, they were easy to scare off.

Leaning against the handmade railing, she heard it creak against her weight, but felt it hold firm as she sipped at the lukewarm cup of coffee in hand. It felt like it had been ages since she had last been able to enjoy the quiet and some coffee to boot. There were those few rare times she had been able to sneak to the roof of the police station for a few minutes to enjoy the solitude- although the hissing of nearby feral ghouls had always ruined it.

Not to mention if anyone was caught on the roof they were obligated to fix the constantly breaking spotlight, which was somehow still in too good of shape to retire. Even if the Raiders had shot it to hell, but had managed to never actually break the glass- which was the result of either shit aim, or shit bullets.

... None of that mattered now though.

It was the quiet mornings like this that made her look back with absolutely no regrets.

That made her look back and be damn glad that Nora had been on their side the whole time; and that the woman was able to offer them a way out if they wanted it. And both she and Danse did, so they took whatever offer Nora could give. Which, looking back on it now, was more than generous.

Her and her Minutemen had been patching up this old coastal cottage for some time now- supposingly they pulled a large transport truck out of the house itself, which Haylen had yet to take as the full truth. Although it would explain the busted floorboards and minor sinkhole underneath the house. Either way, they were able to get it back into decent shape before their priorities shifted; they were apparently able to clear the Mirelurks off of an island nearby, and keep them off, providing yet another safe haven. So all of their resources and focus went to the new settlement for now- considering it was much larger, and a better use of their time.

Either way, since everyone had forgotten about the cottage for the most part, Nora offered it to them.

And while it was a little rundown, it was an easy fixer-upper. The cottage had four walls and a door, which made it secured enough- with the exception of the hole in the floorboards, which Haylen was working on. There was a small boathouse on the property as well, which Danse was working on fixing it up; they hadn't decided what exactly they would use it for, but it was worth keeping around until they made a choice on it.

Semi-white sands, a small picket fence, and an oceanfront view- it was all a little hard to turn down.

Not to mention, Nora had struck a deal with Maxson that said as long as he kept his soldiers away from her Minutemen settlements, she would assist the Brotherhood where she could. And it took some debating, apparently, before Maxson agreed. Nora said it was the worst thing she had signed herself up to, but she had to protect her people first, and it would keep the Brotherhood off of their backs in case any of them wandered into the area.

A lot of hassles, Haylen understood, but it certainly made faking her death to a bunch of Super Mutants all the more worth it. It was a shame that all that was left of her was her helmet, her ripped vest, and some blood- but that's just how it went with those cannibalistic monsters.

... Haylen still felt a ping of guilt at having to leave some of her brothers and sisters behind- namely Rhys. But she knew he would carry on well without her, and he would continue to go on to make the Brotherhood proud.

She needed to be here anyways.

It was more important for her to be here.

Haylen heard the sound of the floorboards creaking behind her, and pretended not to notice them- instead focusing her actions on the cup in her hand, and the sounds of the waves breaking. The corners of her lips lifted though as she felt a pair of arms slip around her and felt his head press against her shoulder. She quietly laughed at the subtle gesture, before she felt him momentarily lift her off of her feet as he pulled her back into a tight embrace.

It was hard to ignore just how small she felt against him.

Or how tightly he had her pulled to him.

"Sleep well?" she asked, wiggling slightly in his grasp until he set her back on her feet.

"Better than I have before," Danse answered, as he moved his hands to the railing in front of her, somewhat pinning her between the two of them. She watched as he looked out to the ocean front, and swore she caught the relaxed hint of happiness on his face- which was something she was seeing a little more every day. "We got a long day ahead of us, you know."

"Hm-hm," Haylen nodded, taking one more sip of her coffee, before she offered him the cup- which he took. "I need to finalize the basement, and make sure it's sturdy enough to withstand the floorboard weight before I install the hatch. And you need to finish patching up that old boathouse so we can get the doors to close and lock on the inside. If we're lucky, and we finish early, we can start work on the dock again- hopefully with more success this time."

He laughed into the cracked ceramic cup, before he handed it back to her. "Well maybe if you hadn't fallen into the water yesterday-"

"Well maybe if you had secured the plank correctly," she interrupted.

"It was secured."

"Oh? Is that so?" Haylen pressed, as she turned around to face him, although she had to physically look up in order to do so. "Then why did I end up in the water after stepping on it?"

Danse hesitated, the words stumbling on his lips as he tried to put them together. And something told Haylen that she might not like his answer. "... You have horrible balance," he finally spoke. "Look, the boards are sitting in the middle of the water; they probably got wet when the tide came in, and you slipped on one and fell in."

"Then how did the board come in with me?" she asked, before she gently prodded his chest with one finger. "And I would be _very_ careful with how I answered that if I were you."

"Look, we have a long day ahead of us, we can't exactly sit around and argue," he deflected instead- much to her amusement. He never had been one to easily admit that he was in the wrong. "How about when we work on the dock later, we try to re-create what happened yesterday and see who was at fault?"

"Fine, but I'm giving you a heads up right now- it was you," Haylen insisted, as she wiggled her way out from underneath his arms, before she headed back into the refurbished cottage- hearing him briefly laugh behind her.

Despite hating water, she didn't necessarily mind taking the unnecessary dive the day before. Sure, she got soaking wet, and had to change immediately- not to mention douse herself in clean water and take a Rad-Away or two. But somehow cuddling up with him for warmth while she waited for her clothing to dry didn't seem quite so bad.

It was the first time she had heard him laugh in a long time though- like that loud, genuine laugh that was rare to hear from him in the first place.

He had still been concerned about her safety, but even she had to admit that she broke the surface laughing as well. It was just something that couldn't avoid being laughed at- not even for the two of them.

Despite all the protests, and the fighting it took to get here... there were no regrets.

They were happy.

They were safe.

And they had each other.


End file.
